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, by Jacob Wolki Creating little workers
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Creating little workers
- , by Jacob Wolki
- 7 min reading time
Creating a work ethic in your children
Our first born Otto (7) is a pretty special kid, not least of all because of his impressive work ethic, which raises eyebrows and solicits comments almost daily.
Your first child gets a fair few unique opportunities. They are first in line to drag from mums untouched nutrition bank. They don’t have to share or fight for attention with siblings - until more turn up. They are raised by younger parents than their siblings are & they often have their milestones made a bit of a bigger deal. (How many families have photo albums for kids 1 & maybe 2 but strangely not 3+?!)
They are also the test dummies and primary result of trial and error, have to share down with younger siblings (which they never were on the receiving end of) & often have a first born duty of care installed into them.
Otto certainly does. Last week, while I was in town working, Ann ducked down the driveway to check in on some tradesmen who were helping us install our Glamping tents. Esme (1) was still asleep, so Ann gave Otto the radio and said to call her if she woke up.
As Ann was walking back to the house, she received a radio transmission from Otto. “Mum, Esme’s awake and she’s real happy! She had a dirty nappy and the poo went everywhere, but I wiped it up and put a new nappy on her. I had to change her onesie, she’s in the one with lady beetles on it now. OVER!”
Ann called me laughing, telling me the story. I beamed with pride. We have never made Otto change his siblings nappies - we have never even asked him to.
Otto has an instilled duty of care, responsibility and work ethic.
Is Otto a fluke? I used to think maybe.
I had better keep my braggadocios claims and special tactics to myself as my next kids might be lazy sods and trip me up.
Folks, Theo (3) is a great young boy. He’s adventurous, cheeky and has no issues rolling up his sleeves to help collect firewood, cook breakfast or clean up the house. Esme, while young, is showing her own initiative and work ethic. And it starts with play.
Here are my 3 tips to get your children working - and loving it.
1. Lead by example.
Monkey see, monkey do - it’s really that simple. If you don’t have the immense privilege of being able to work in front of your children, you still have plenty of opportunities. House chores, weekend jobs, hobbies- there is always lots to be done. Firstly, work studiously and diligently.
Secondly, protect your language. Complaining, whining and speaking negatively about work, regardless of the task at hand, will translate into your children picking up the same frame of mind and habits.
2. Make it fun.
My Grandpa has always said to me, “A man’s work is child’s play”. He would point out how men drive trucks, and little boys play trucks. Mum keeps the house and little kids play house. Think about every games that kids play, they are all work and life imitation. They are fun. Why would playing AT something be more fun and engaging that actually DOING the thing?
It’s not. I’d rather move my cows into a fresh paddock, than play a farming simulation on my phone. But a lot wouldn’t. So, It’s important to remember that your children are just that - kids. Don’t get frustrated.
If they are interested in getting engaged in your chores or jobs, create a role that they can achieve at their level (or think that they are achieving), work at their pace and give them praise and adoration for being so brilliant!
3. Don’t force them.
Your mini-me will show an interest in helping you do jobs from as young as 1. Remember the first time your little person picked something up and handed it to you? They were trying to help! You probably clapped and praised and got them so excited that they wanted to do it again.
This behaviour loop doesn’t have to end at the edge of the play rug. This behaviour will naturally appear and you will be there to coach it along. Forcing your kids to do jobs from a young age puts a negative spin on the task.
If your children are older, getting into this rhythm will be a bit more difficult, but just rely on tips 1 & 2 and you’ll be surprised. I can get all the cousins, nieces, nephews & friends kid outside doing whatever job I want within minutes.
4. Lose the screens.
Did you notice that I said I had 3 tips, and you just started tip #4? How astute of you. Tips 1,2 & 3 and practical, common sense, and easy. So is tip #4. But most people in today's world will not be able to do it.
They are addicted to screen time and their children will be too. The fact is, that screen time creates behaviour issues, concentration problems, addictions, ruins sleep cycles and more.
Can it be used in moderation? Maybe - are you doing that?
The issue with screens is 3 fold, in my humble opinion. Firstly, the blue light is no good, especially out of daylight hours, and especially for developing brains. Secondly, the content is often unsuitable and inappropriate. Thirdly, they are so addictive that it's easy for children (and adults) to binge.
Need I go on? Do yourself a favour and throw out your TV. We did, and we are never going back.
As an example of these tips in play, my Esme wants to do everything with me.
So I put out the trash, holding her. I lock up the chooks, holding her. I fetch more firewood - holding her! She is watching everything, completely focused. I engage her. I collect 4 eggs, and I pass 1 to her to hold. The look on her face, if it makes it in-tact to the house, when she passes it to mum. Amazing. She dropped it? “Uh oh! On no! It’s OK, the dogs will eat it.”
I lift up the lid for the wheelie bit and drop the trash bag in, then I help her close the lid. Big claps! Smart girl, what a ripper!
She see's dad doing the thing & wants to do the thing. I engage her at her level and make it fun. She isn't forced.
Does it take me longer to collect the eggs, lock up the chooks, fetch firewood and take the trash out, having her on my hip? Absolutely. Time preference. Everything worthwhile takes time.
What's the rush, anyway? Need to be quick so you can get back on the couch to watch more crap TV?
The beautiful thing about having children with conscientious work ethics is that they are such a pleasure to be around. They become self sufficient earlier - Otto has been cooking his bacon and eggs for breakfast since 3 years old. This is great for you and great for them.
They will be more confident, more capable, more employable, more marry-able - just better people!
Have more children,
Jacob
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